Boss Witch: Friday Fashion

Okay, I know what you’re thinking: this blog is supposed to be about wellness.

But the purpose of OBW is to start conversations and give blessings and joy to ALL REAL-LIFE BOSS WITCHES. That means you maybe have a full time job, or you’re at home with one to eight babies right now, or you’re caring for someone. Or maybe you’re having a really bad time at the moment (sending love to you) and you just want answers to this burning question:

WHAT DOES A BOSS WITCH WEAR?

A person with blue hair wears sunglasses and a blue printed top.

Answer: Actually, anything the f*ck you want, witch, because it’s your body, your life and you can wear what you want. It doesn’t matter what everyone else thinks. You should feel comfortable and fabulous and like a Boss Witch at all times. And if you want to wear sweats for nine days straight, guess what? You’re still a Boss Witch. Not interested in doing laundry this week? No problem. Still a Boss Witch. Want to walk around your house naked for three days? That is extremely Boss Witchy, congratulations.

A person with long hair wears a hat and gazes out at the countryside by sunset.

Life is hard, and fashion is one of those things that, for me, brings me a glorious, daydreamy escape. So today, I am going to bring you a feast for the eyes – some aspirational Boss Witch Wear from pop culture, fashion brands I like and the best Boss Witch Characters ever (in my opinion).

AMERICAN HORROR STORY: COVEN

A promotional image from American Horror Story: Coven.

I don’t really like watching horror that much, because really gory and violet sh*t tends to give me nightmares. But my partner loves horror. And I work in making horror content, so that’s a little riddle for another time.

So I agree to give AHS: Coven a go because WITCHES. And boy, was I happy I did. Can we talk about the heavenly joy of giant black hats, big sunnies, thick-heeled ankle boots and the overall AllSaints aesthetic of this series? Can we discuss the overall Boss Witch that is Angela Bassett? Can we look at the gorgeous tailoring on Sarah Poulson? Yes, yes we can.

Angela Bassett in period costume in American Horror Story: Coven

But for now, just feast your eyes.

PENNY DREADFUL

A promotional image from Penny Dreadful.

All witches love Eva Green, I think? Actually, I think just everyone loves Eva Green. My friend met her once and apparently she is just lovely. So there you go.

Anyway, I digress.

Eva Green in Penny Dreadful.

Penny Dreadful is basically Victoriana Boss Witch gospel. If, like me, you are partial to black lace, a high collar, some excellent corsetry and Victorian button boots, then Penny Dreadful is the escape you have been waiting for. It’s dark, it’s good, it’s beautifully written, and the costumes are INSANE. Kudos there to costume designer, Gabriella Pescucci, who, by the way, also designed for The Borgias, which is another very, very pretty and entertaining show, which deals with poison, and therefore counts as Boss Witchy.